Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Murdering for Jesus

I'm descended from a long line of survivors, people who lived through horrors most of the people I call my friends can't even imagine. In too many of them the scars never healed properly. They lost something vital to life, some integral part of self that left them incomplete human beings. The other ones, the ones who did manage to put the pieces of themselves back together again came out stronger and more alive than when they went in. It almost made up for the ones that came out severely damaged for life. Almost.

I've spent a lifetime dwelling on this as I lived with the war wounded who couldn't deal with the pain so they passed it on and raised children with anger, with bitterness, and sometimes an outright hatred of human beings. Considering what some of them went through, I can't judge them for this. In fact, because of it I became a person who is reluctant to judge, who tries to understand the depth of wounds, the reasons for the missing pieces of humanity. I've always wanted to make up for what they didn't get a chance to experience: tolerance, acceptance, equality. I felt it was my obligation, the reason I was born. I was one of the balancing stones of the next generation. I never questioned this role. I just knew it as mine.

And yes, I've spent a lifetime balancing out the selfishness around me by being unselfish, especially when it was difficult. It's so much easier to want than to not want. We have to train ourselves to not want, to let someone else have, to stay out of the way of someone else's happiness needs. I'm kind to people others are cruel to because I know how it feels to have others be cruel to me based on things that exist only in their own fears. I've always figured people's lives were their own to live and as long as you didn't hurt the other animals, no one had a right to tell you how to live. And hurting someone was not an excuse and killing was always wrong, no matter who did it.

I learned these valuable lessons from some of the most fucked up people on the planet. But the strange thing is,  because of what was done to them they developed a sort of reverence for tolerance, a kind of wistful optimisim. It was their version of religion and they worshipped daily on their dreams of a world that wouldn't do to their children what was done to them. 

An important lesson I learned was that  in spite of the horrors they went through, in spite of the mean cruel side of humanity they had to endure, not one of them killed another human being over some mythical god. In fact, if war taught them anything, it was that religion was the biggest obstacle to peace and harmony in the world.

That doesn't mean everyone in my family were pacifists who embraced all humanity as their brothers and sisters. Hate is an evil disease and it gets passed on to the nicest people and turns them into not so nice people. Often I would look at some members of my family and wonder what they would have been like without war, what would they have been like without having to survive hate and others trying to kill them just because they believed differently or didn't believe at all. And I often wondered what they did believe because for the most part, they kept these things to themselves as they had learned it was not something safe to talk about openly. Power was too unpredictable and it had a way of turning on you when you least expected it to.

There's a lot of Atheists in my family, especially the ones who almost died from someone else's religious hatred, and especially their children, of which I am one. No god would stand by and let what happen to them happen so I never believed in one. Believers like to say there are no Atheists in foxholes and to them I say it takes war to make people stop believing. It takes hunger, and fear, and the loss of most everyone you know and love to convince you god is a figment of a special privileged class who have never had their beliefs tested by too much reality. It takes reading history and paying close attention to how the unholy churches and their evil minions killed millions over many generations simply because they believed differently. It takes seeing the pattern of hate emerge over and over again to finally understand it is not some god who is preaching hatred from the pulpit, from the radio, from the television screen. It is not god, but it is some mean fucked up excuse for a human being who is spreading that hatred.

And yesterday, that hatred caused the death of a doctor, a man who had dedicated his life to helping other human beings, a man who was gunned down in church, of all places, in the house of the god these hatemongering fanatics believe is so loving and kind and honorable.

I understand who these people are. I grew up with some of them. They are people who are lacking in basic human compassion, who believe their hell on earth is punishment for being human. They are pitiful and weak excuses for human beings. They are easily led, easily controlled  by those who have ungodly agendas. They hang on every word the hatemongers spew as if it were the word of their own god. They don't see themselves as the manipulated fools they are, the tools they are to further an invisible agenda by those far more rich and powerful than they will ever be. They listen and hear them say go and kill for me, go take out this symbol so we can exploit it for political gain. Their puppetmasters don't care about the families, the loved ones, the communities that suffer. It's all about politics and getting someone to murder to further an agenda.

This is who killed this doctor and the other ones. This is who blows up buildings and clinics. This is who kills indiscriminately in war and turf battles. This is who kills over an imaginary god only they can see and yet want to inflict on everyone else. This is who the real terrorists are and it's way past time we started paying attention to what they are doing, what they are trying to destroy. It's time to make them accountable for their actions. Put them on trial for the accessories to murder they are, for the treasonous bastards they are, for the hatemongering bigotrys they perpetuate in the name of a political agenda designed to enrich and empower them further.

It is time to put the blame where it truly belongs, on those that led yet another  poor stupid manipulated idiot to kill--the O'Reilly's, the Limbaughs, the Gingriches of the world. It is their agenda that drove this man to kill another human being. Not god, not the easter bunny, not the tooth fairy, but soul-less, empty hearted men who care nothing about humanity and want only to enrich themselves further, steal even more money and power, spread even more hatred and intolerance bnecause in the end they know the one truth they can't hide from: as human beings they are complete and utter failures and history and the generations within their own families will forever remember them for this failure. They will serve as cautionary lessons to wiser and more educated generations to come, just our generation learned from the horrors of our parent's generation that some people are just plain evil.

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1 comment:

Windyridge said...

"religion was the biggest obstacle to peace and harmony in the world." WELL SAID!